Amorous At Amaroo

Every Bond super-villain must have a lair preferably under or near a dormant volcano. Every charlatan guru must have a cult compound. Prem Rawat has his cult compound - which he calls Amaroo - in Peak Crossing in South-East Queensland. It's at Amaroo where at last Prem Rawat's promises of love and bliss are becoming real for his long waiting premies. One premie who wished to remain anonymous told us "Its like when you're at Amaroo and you've had darshan of your Lord in the greeting line, you feel young again." The glory and ecstatic bliss of darshan changes everything and suddenly everyone looks young and beautiful again. They transform into gopis. What happens at Amaroo is private and secret. Its between the Lord and his lovers. Just like its always been for premies: what happens at Amaroo, stays at Amaroo.

What happens when you get a few thousand 60+ years old premies together in the sensuous, steamy atmosphere of Amaroo? They're staying in pents allowing for muchos sneaking around at night and finding your way into the pent of your latest inamorata and releasing all that pent-up frustration in a pent here and a pent there and wherever takes your fancy. And of course, Doctor John, our very own Dr Feelgood, is always on hand at Amaroo dispensing whatever substances are desired to uplift, prolong, moisten or harden.

As the good doctor discovered back in 1973 the Pineal gland sends the kundalini through the swadisthan chakra to the penis and once it's been properly revitalised the nectar will flow blissfully.

And if you're having trouble getting into the right romantic mood, just lay back, close your eyes and think of Maharaji.

Click here to see everything you always wanted to know about darshan at Amaroo - the "Greeting Line".